This past weekend the Life Teen youth group at Ss.Cyril and Methodius went on a retreat to a center called Camp De Sales in Brooklyn, Michigan. It was absolutely the most wonderful weekend that I've had in so many weeks. There could not have been a better way to refuel our spiritual lives.

Forty people boarded a bus that would take all of us on a journey. We went to the same place, experienced the same talks, but the journey was different for all of us. Some got more out of it than others, some will carry what they got out of it for a while until it comes in handy for later. 

The beginning of the retreat started at the Activity Center at church. We were told to arrive at four and we left around 7:30 (I think). First we had dinner then we were separated into different groups with around nine people in each group. I didn't really know anyone in my group except for two girls. We came up with a group name and a little jingle/slogan to go along with it. Every group was really creative- there were names ranging from Team Ama-zing to The God Squad! My group was Nine Ladies Praying. When we made our poster and jingle we shared it in front of everyone and much laughter begin to envelop the room. After we went to confession and adoration in the chapel. Then we saw a short play constructed by one of the core member's which expressed how beloved we are and how much the Heavenly Father protects us when we are tempted.

I have to admit, I wasn't too exited to go on the retreat in the first place and my parents sort of pushed me into it. It wasn't because I thought God didn't love me, I was just experiencing spiritual dryness. The devil works really hard during Lent and he did not want any of us to go. 

The first night at the retreat center we started to explore the identity that God gave us. We watched Jason Gray's music video, Remind Me Who I Am. In the video, several people held up different cardboard signs with their identity on it such as; illegal, addict, victim, they used me, angry, etc. 

After, we were separated into small groups and discussed our personal identities. We have false/secondary identities and then the positive ones under those. I can't really remember what everyone in my group said, so when I got home I asked around for people to share their experiences again so that we could share them with everyone. One girl said that her identity was "to see the worst in people" and to "judge harshly". By the end of the weekend she realized that "we all have struggles" and that she should be there to comfort others. More identities included of people being "broken", feeling that they were "not good enough" or "not holy enough", some people also felt "lonely" and "confused". 

I didn't feel comfortable at the moment sharing my identity with my group. Although, after adoration that night there was a chance for all of us to come up and write our identity on a piece of cardboard with black marker. We were called to go up and instantly several people rose from their seats. I stayed where I was but soon my legs started to walk to the altar without my permission. I picked up the marker and wrote "rejected" on the piece of cardboard and laid it down next to the other identities. 

When I walked back to my seat I read what everyone wrote - lonely, broken, not holy enough, overweight... The list could go on forever. I never realized how much other people really struggled too. Every time I went to Life Teen, I only saw people's bright faces never full of sadness or hurt. I thought that all the teens and especially core members were basically walking saints on earth. Soon enough, many of us came to realize that that was not the case.

Pictured above is the Chapel.

During the night we were invited to sign up for a holy hour. The holy hours were for an hour each during the night and they ended at 8:30 right before benediction in the morning. I went to the 12-1am holy hour with seven or so other people. Before we left, from Ss.Cyril and Methodius,  we received prayer journals, each had the word "BELOVED" painted on the front of the journal. I remember one of the core members talking to us about prayer journals and how much they help with your prayer life. I pushed that idea to the back of my head thinking it would never work. Well, that night I figured out that writing in a prayer journal does help a lot! It's a great stress reliever and a wonderful way to give everything to God.

Lately I haven't felt God's presence at all and it's been difficult for me to pray and concentrate while praying. But the prayer journal has helped so much! My friend said, "It really helps you concentrate on what you're praying because you actually have to think about it while you're writing it down. You don't get distracted as much either." 

The next day we woke up for benediction in the chapel at 8:30. I realized something different about the benediction there. Maybe it was being separated from all the distractions at home, or maybe it was just the fact that I was able to be there with an amazing group of people. 

The next few events are sort of scattered in my head, so if I go out of order I apologize. After benediction one of the core members told us their testimony which really touched my heart. The retreat was mostly about the Our Father prayer, and she was focusing on the "give us this day our daily bread" part (I'm pretty sure it was this part, if I'm wrong someone please correct me!) She stretched the fact that God is our Father and that He is always there looking out for us. 

Even if we may not have a father currently living with us we can still have a close relationship with God! He does not want us to push Him away because of the relationship we have or do not have with our fathers on earth.  God will always be there for you! He is always waiting with open arms. He has more of an ability to love us than our earthly fathers. After the talk we headed back to the chapel for a communion service.

When the communion service was finished we went to the meeting house to watch the movie Courageous and play a game. The movie expressed how important it is to have our earthly fathers present at home. There are many difficulties for those who do not have their fathers living at home, loving and protecting them.  Following the movie we played a game then listen to another core member give her testimony. The core member's testimony really taught me to be strong and that there's always hope even if it may take a while to fix things. Once again we separated into small groups to discuss how close we are to God the Father.

In my group we talked about how we have God the Heavenly Father as a dad too. We discussed the difference between our relationships with our earthly fathers and God the Father. The majority of the relationships, at least in my group, were closer to our fathers on earth. That's good if we're close to our dads here, but God our Heavenly Father has the ability to love us more than anyone! Jesus gave up his life for us, which is the biggest sacrifice anyone can make. Think on a scale of 1-10 (ten being the best) how close you are to your father on earth and to God. Which one is higher? The answer may not be God, but if it isn't we got to work on getting that up.

Kateri shared that "Before the retreat, I usually didn't think of God as ‘my Father’. My earthly father fulfills all the duties of a dad. While praying in front of the Blessed Sacrament and reflecting on the theme of the weekend, I realized that while I am blessed with an amazing dad, he cannot give me the fulfillment that my Heavenly Father can give. I made a resolution to strive to be a better daughter to God the Father, and to live out my duties as the daughter of this mighty king." 

Preceding the small group discussions was benediction and adoration. The cardboard signs that were left at the foot of the altar weren't there anymore. They were hung up around the tabernacle and altar. Instead of our false identities, the word "beloved" was shown. I wanted to believe that I was beloved so badly, but my own insecurities continued to hold me back. The devil does not want us to know that we are beloved. The evil spirits will try to make us feel the exact opposite every chance we get. But we can always fight and give it all to the Heavenly Father! 

God made us in His own perfect image! He is waiting for us with outstretched arms to realize that we are beloved. I could see that for some of my friends that the thought of being beloved was starting to kick in. But for me, it wouldn't hit full effect until later that night.

For the last time that night we broke up into small groups. We separated around the chapel, my group went to the second floor and sat in a circle. One person would sit in the middle and the rest had the opportunity to put our hands on the person and pray over them. It was an extremely powerful experience that I have difficulty expressing in words. Praying for each other in our groups was just so peaceful - but only if you let yourself be at peace. God works in many mysterious ways, some that we may never understand. By the end of the night, I felt safe with those in my prayer group. They were people who would always be there for you if you needed someone to talk to.

That's what Life Teen is - a group where we can come together to strengthen each other in our faith. I can't believe it took me till now to realize that the people there will not only catch you when you fall, but pick you back up and help you through any struggle. It dawned on me that everyone struggles; I used to see everyone at Life Teen as problem-free angels, that were almost always at a spiritual high. That's not always the case. (If it is, please teach me your ways;) Everyone has their ups and downs and that's why Life Teen is so important to stick with. 

That night I realized it, and I'm going to hold onto these memories for the rest of my life. 

Sunday we talked about out experiences and our identities. I realized that my identity was beloved. The whole weekend I was struggling so hard to find it, when really, it was sitting in front of my face for the past 30 some hours or so. (It literally was, I always carried the prayer journal with me all weekend which read beloved on the front.) The whole time I thought that it was God rejecting me, but it was I who was rejecting Him. He gave up His life for us, that is the biggest sacrifice ever. We are all so beloved. 

Effects on the Teens: (I asked the teens what they got out of the retreat and/or what changed for them.)
--"My identity changed because I was a person who saw the worst in people. I judged harshly and I soon realized we all have struggles. I liked how we all grew closer together! I made new friendships and strengthened the weak ones! I also learned how to pray spontaneously so that will be helpful!" (Anna)
--"I now keep having the urge to read the Bible. I really never thought about my identity until the retreat, I’m going to try to fix or mend my ‘false’ identity and the Lord is now reminding me who I am! We are beloved!" (Laural)
--"I realized how I see myself verses how people see me. I feel that I only see false identities in myself and God will help me see my true identity if I follow the path He has set for my life." (Genevieve)
--"(The retreat) made me realize what my true identity is… Beloved. I loved how in small groups everyone was open with each other. I thought overall it was a great experience. I also loved hearing the core members testimonies." (Bridget)
--"I’d like to touch on one subject in particular. I can’t stress how important it is to me to build my friendships on a strong foundation. In recent years have I discovered where I can find that foundation, and it is, of course, Christ. How can a friendship fall apart when it’s built on the most perfect foundation possible? Spending time with each other in a safe, sacred environment with ample opportunity to pray together was one of the greatest parts of the retreat, and I have no doubt that this is exactly what Jordan wants us to get out of Life Teen, and why she and the core team put such work into it." (James)

Effects the Core Members Noticed and Experienced: (I asked the core members about the changes they saw in the teens and their overall experience.)
--"This weekend, I saw so many teens that were open to discovering how to deepen their relationship with God, the Father. Teens talked about how they relate to God as a father, and they were so honest about their prayer lives and the struggles they face. In small groups they supported each other, grew closer together as a group, and I think we all walked away with a new way to grow closer to God. We were definitely planting seeds of change. As a small group leader and chaperon I felt the retreat was less about my personal experience and more about how I could be there for each of the teens and their experience. I feel so blessed to have been part of this retreat, to grow closer to the teens and watch the way God moves in each of their lives." (core member)
--"I think what touched me the most was how hard I saw so many of the teens trying to get something from this weekend. I know some of them didn't even know if they could get anything out of it, or what they could get out of it - but they really tried. I saw so many teens also using what we've been talking about for the past few weeks at Life Teen and taking the prayer process to heart and really striving for a close relationship with God through prayer.I hope and pray that the retreat experience will continue to help all of the teens who went - whether they feel completely changed and liberated, or simply gained knowledge about how much they have to grow. There's nothing I want more than for every single person at that retreat to know God's love and have an intimate relationship with him." (Anne)
--"I saw the teens begin to open up. Not only with each other but with themselves and the Holy Spirit. I witnessed some taking baby steps and others giant leaps into adoration, meditation, journaling, and prayer. I sensed teens starting to "get it" and wanting more. I felt God the Father smiling down on all His BELOVED." (Jenni)

I would like to give a big thank you to all the core members and everyone who worked so hard to put this retreat together! It was truly an amazing experience that none of us would ever forget. Also a big thank you to the person who took all these wonderful pictures! 

Have a blessed day everyone - and remember - you are beloved!

First, I must apologize

For the whips I slashed across your skin,
only to pursue selfish thoughts

For the nails I drove into your precious hands and feet,
only to protect what I thought to be important

For the crown of thorns I fixed upon your smooth locks,
only to turn my back on You, who gave me everything

Your blood saving me,
when I clung to life by a thread

And yet,
it took me till now to realize

Now I shall fall on my knees
with praying hands

Because before I never gave a fighting chance

When I was younger, I never thought much of the scapular. Around the age of eight, I used to wear it because my mom told me to. I can't believe it took me till recently to see the amazing gift the Blessed Virgin Mary gave us. 

I did some research to learn more about the history of Saint Simon Stock's vision of Mary. Soon after Our Lady appeared to Saint Simon, a miracle happened in the Order, and it was saved. At first, only the Carmelites wore the brown scapular, but by the 14th century many others started to wear the brown scapular. 

By wearing the brown scapular we tell Mary that we love, trust, and appreciate her. "When we use it as a prayer, Our Lady draws us to the Sacred Heart of Her Divine Son. It is good, therefore, to hold the scapular in the hand. A prayer offered while holding the Scapular is as perfect as a prayer can be. It is especially in the time of temptation that we need the powerful intercession of God's Mother. The evil spirit is utterly powerless when the wearer of a scapular faces temptation, calling upon the Holy Virgin in this silent devotion."

Our Blessed Mother has given us some conditions:
~always wear the brown scapular
~be modest according to if you are married/single
~follow the fasts of the Church OR pray five decades of the holy rosary OR do other good work

Thank you for reading, and God bless!

Sources: Sister of Carmel Website       Brown Scapular History Website

From time to time we may think that we're not good enough. We may think that we're not pretty enough, or smart enough. What is "enough"? Why do we crave this "pretty enough", "smart enough", etc.?  

*First I just want to say, sorry I haven't posted in a long time. I've had a lot going on and barely any time to write and when I did have time I didn't know what to write about. For a long time I thought about just ending Forever Electric forever. Luckily, my passion for writing kept me going.*

Do you ever get that feeling inside that's just empty - that lonely empty feeling? I'm sure we all have at least one point in our life. That "feeling" that we get - is so not true! 

God is always there with us, holding our hand through every single step we take! He never leaves us alone, because without Him we would be nothing. 

From time to time we might think we have to "put on a mask" to impress others and to be liked. Sometimes we might be who others want us to be. We put on this mask that hides the beauty of how God created us. It's not right. God made us in His very own image! We shouldn't feel the need to hide who we are. Because everyone is AMAZING! We are children of God! He gave up His life for us! And if it would have come down to it, He would have gave up His life for just one of us. 

Please, take time to thank Him for everything He has done - even the little things that we might not even realize till we truly look back. There's just so much to be thankful and happy for, sometimes we don't even realize it. 

God bless!

This past weekend there was a festival at the parish I belong to and I was hanging around with a few of my close friends. Two of my friends and I decided to go into the church to take a picture of the altar and say a prayer.

There were three of us in the church, it was completely silent. I stopped in the middle of the church, I felt an ultimate peace. It was a familiar feeling and right away I knew where I was the last time I felt so moved - at Stuebenville. 

I stood still, as if any movement would break the barrier of peace. After a few minutes I had this sudden urge that I need to kneel down and pray, so that's what I did.

I ask God what was He trying to tell me. I knew it had to be something really important. I was crying, I felt the Holy Spirit in my heart.

I kept on asking Him what He was trying to tell me, and all at once I felt the words in my heart - not enough people are praying, not enough people believe. Not enough people believe in our Savior Jesus Christ! He came down to earth to save us from the fires of Hell! He gave us everything, He gave us His life!

Not enough people know! He told me to show others prayer. To show others what it is like to always know that you are loved by God! We need to always spread the wonderful word of our Lord, some don't know. Some don't know how amazing He is, and all the miracles He performs every day!

The Holy Spirit came to me and told me that not enogh people are praying. He told me that not enough people know. Not enough people see the love of Christ. We need to show people the love of God everywhere we go! Whether we invite a friend to youth group, or a Bible study, we need to show others the amazing word of Jesus 

I know that if we come together and show others the love God has for us, and the love we have for Him, we can change many things. Through Him, we can do anything.

God bless!

Last night when I went to bed I followed my usual routine of saying prayers and talking to God. I started to think about how much He loves everyone, even those who hurt Him.

Then I thought about all those who have hurt me. I asked myself - "Do I love those who hurt me, as much as God loves each and every one of us?" 

I find it very hard to love those who constantly hurt me and sometimes it's hard to forgive them too. But it is always good to remember that God forgives everybody. If we want to live with Him one day we need to learn how to live like Him, in a way. 

I thought, if God loves all of us, I should be able to love those who hurt me. Then I asked Him, "Father, how do I love those who hurt me over and over?" Immediately my heart jumped, and I was filled with a certain feeling that I can't even explain. It came for a second, and left as quickly as it had started. And there was a little voice inside my heart pounding the words, "Pray for those who hurt you, and then you will learn to love everyone." 

Prayer is so powerful! I have never experienced an answer from God in this way. There are several different ways God answers our prayers, and it is absolutely amazing that He answers them every single time. We might not know that answer for ages (as it sometimes seems) but He always answers them.

God bless!  †

This summer has been super busy for a lot of us, especially those in high school who are taking A.P. classes that give loads of summer homework. ;) Nope... I'm not behind at all... 

With upcoming school activities, homework, and other daily interuptions - we don't really stop to thank God for everything. We just want to ask of Him more and more. But He has given us so much already! He gave us His life. Which is the biggest sacrifice! We always ask Him for things, but how many times a day do we thank Him for what He has given us?

If we thank God for what He has given us three times a day instead of asking Him for things, we will be much more grateful for what we have. The people in Africa don't have as much as we have, and we take it for granted! We can't do that.

God gave us this life for a very special reason. We may not find out that reason till the very day we die, but till then I know that He will love it if we take every day and pray, read the Bible, and spread the amazing word of Jesus Christ!

I know I haven't been posting a lot lately, I went on vacation then I started to have lots of computer problems so this is going to be a short post before my computer crashes again. Also, my posts have been kind of repetitive, I realized, I guess might take a little break so I can find more topics to write about.

So I had this whole thing written out, then my computer decided to delete all of it. It got me starting to think that God wanted me to write out a different message. 

I used to have this motto, "I'm riding a roller coaster that only goes up." I guess at some point in life we figure out that, our life has to drop at one time or another. I told myself that if I turned negative things around and into something positive my roller coaster would never go back down. It didn't take me that long to figure out that we have to hit a bump in the tracks every so often. 

"Life is a roller coaster, you can either scream every time you hit a bump, or you can throw your hands up in the air and enjoy it." There will be times when things don't go exactly the way we like it, but we just have to turn those things around for the better. Either that or suck it up and deal with it, if you want to be tough. ;)) I'm just kidding with you. ;)) We need to learn how to not look at people/events for the good in them. We can turn them around for the better, but still we have to keep in mind that things aren't always going to stay at the top no matter how positive we can be.

There will be times when things don't go how we planned, or when others constantly push you down. But there's always one solution that will work the best, even if it's not the way we expect. Pray! God loves you and He will do anything to protect you. He is always listening even though it may not feel like it all the time, He will answer your prayers but there's so many different ways we have to listen to Him to find out what He wants us to do. 

"Nor did demons crucify Him; it is you who have crucified Him and crucify Him still, when you delight in your vices and sins."

 As soon as I read this a deep hurt overcame myself. I can't get over the fact that Jesus died for our sins in pain. He had the power to not carry the cross. He can do anything, He could have backed out, but He didn't. Jesus gave up His life for us and we seem to take it for granted most of the time.

How many times have you stopped to think about what God has done for you? He's done so much that I can't even think of half of the things he has done. God is truly amazing! Sometimes we wave over the fact that He died for us in pain and suffering. We don't think very much of it, but the fact that He died for us is something that we should always thank Him for.

I think that sometimes we ask too much of Him. Instead of always asking him for things we should thank Him for what He has given us. God has given us so much, we don't even realize it. One of the most amazing things He gave us is the Eucharist! We need to thank Him for that every day!

We nailed Jesus to the cross, we took His hands and hurt them. It should be our hands that are hurt and not His, I would carry the cross for Him any day no matter how much pain it would cost. We all have our own small cross to carry too, whether it be something that's hidden or clearly visible. 

My great uncle who recently passed away carried a cross with him every single day. He had to carry a breathing machine with him for the last few years of his life. He once never complained about it but once said - "In order to live we need to die", and that is when we can enter everlasting life. His love for God was truly amazing and I will always look up to him for that.

There is not one person who loves us more than God, He will always love us and never leave us. He is the one person who will not leave if we made a bad choice, if we lose our job and all our friends, He will always be with us. He carried up the cross and opened the gates to Heaven! We should thank Him for that all the time! There is no bigger sacrifice. 

God loves you! †

The video below shows a few clips from The Passion. Every single time I think of the song played I remember how He died for us.